The Amazing Adventures of a Tamagotchi

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status:

Name: Arion

Gender: M

Character type: Crackertchi

Gen: 19

Job: He finds the sparklies

V6 Status

Name: Thursday

Gender: F

Character type: Chantochi

Gen: 16

Band: Storm

Instrument: Boom box

V6 Status (Glam Rock)

Name: Mittens

Gender: M

Character type: Mametchi

Gen: 5

Band: Thunder

Instrument: Violin

Mittens: Hi guys! We went on a picnic with FKOD's school today!

Thursday: And I got married.

Arion: We went to a lake. Too bad we can't swim.

Mittens: Yeah. But at least we had Monroe to keep us company.

Monroe: Gobble.

Arion: Aren't ducks supposed to quack?

Thursday: We're not sure what his deal is. You should just ignore him.

Monroe: Whargarble.

Mittens: Hey, come to think of it, where has Teysa gone off to?

Dr. Blobagus: Mrmph!

FKOD: Yeah, we've heard your crazy doom prophecies before Blobagus, so shut up.

Dr. Blobagus: Mrmph hrm hrah mriph mri!

Arion: Who's Teysa?

Ryyx: He's Dr. Blobagus's son. Of course, it's difficult to tell now, since he's copied the genetic material of quite a few people.

Arion: Okay...?

FKOD: Hmm... he said his copying phase or whatever would end soon. I guess he... is preparing for another phase or something? I'm not sure what he is... or what Blobagus is for that matter.

Dr. Blobagus: Mrmph.

Mittens: Should we let him out just to see what his deal is?

Thursday: He never has anything important to say, though.

Arion: Well, miracles can happen.

FKOD: Okay. If he starts rambling, I'm gonna stick him back in. *lets Dr. Blobagus out*

Dr. Blobagus: Phew! Finally! It's stuffy in there!

FKOD: Do you have something to tell us or no?

Dr. Blobagus: Rest phase. He's off sleeping somewhere, developing into his new form.

Mittens: That's it?

Thursday: No dooms-day rants?

Dr. Blobagus: Well, a guy who's all tuckered out can't do much.

Ryyx: I beg to differ. My older sister has a sleep disorder in which--

FKOD: Don't encourage him, man.

Ryyx: My apologies.

Mittens: Anyways, Dr. Blobagus, what are you, exactly?

Dr. Blobagus: Oh, that's a little tricky to explain. We're... erm... well, first of all, we're extremely varied.

Thursday: Oh. Okay. Why are you just a blob with tentacles? Teysa looked more complex.

Dr. Blobagus: I had very little to copy. I was born in an ocean. Do you have any idea how hard it is for a little blob to move against a current?

FKOD: That's why you need a jet on your tush. Jeez, it's like you never played Spore.

Dr. Blobagus: I couldn't do that! Most things swam away when I approached.

Arion: But... shouldn't you be some kind of sea creature?

Dr. Blobagus: I was caught by a bird, which spat me out, but I stuck to it and made it to land.

FKOD: You should of copied the bird to become some crazy tentacle bird. You'd be cooler.

Dr. Blobagus: Yeah, whatever. Any more inquiries?

Thursday: What's with the whole "he's going to destroy us all" thing?

Dr. Blobagus: ...Long story.

Arion: Oh come on.

Mittens: Seriously, dude.

Ryyx: I like long stories.

Dr. Blobagus: Later, alright? I have important business to deal with.

FKOD: You don't even do anything around here!

Dr. Blobagus: You don't want to know, okay? *leaves*

Ryyx: He's so secretive.

Mittens: He's up to something, I'll bet.

Thursday: Do you guys think he's smart enough to accomplish anything... you know... major?

Arion: The stupidity may be a ruse to distract us.

Thursday: Pfft hahahahah really.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status:

Name: Arion

Gender: M

Character type: Samuraitchi

Gen: 19

Job: He finds the sparklies

V6 Status

Name: Thursday

Gender: F

Character type: Chantochi

Gen: 16

Band: Storm

Instrument: Boom box

V6 Status (Glam Rock)

Name: Knight

Gender: M

Character type: Kuchitamatchi

Gen: 6

Band: N/A

Instrument: Singers

FKOD: THURSDAY.

Thursday: Huh?

FKOD: Where have you been?

Thursday: Whatcha mean by that?

FKOD: I've noticed that you've been sneaking off.

Knight: Music shows.

Thursday: Knight, you little punk! I told you that was a secret!

Arion: Really? How come you aren't frozen?

Thursday: My glitch isn't popping up any more! True story!

FKOD: Well, if that's the case, all will be forgiven. But don't be so sneaky, 'kay?

Thursday: Okay. I just really wanted to perform on stage and all...

Knight: I can't wait 'till I grow up and become a star!

Arion: In your dreams, you are the star. It's you.

Knight: Hey, you're a grown-up, shouldn't you get a job?

Arion: I haven't gotten any offers in the mail. It'll take a day or so, I think.

Thursday: Man, it must stink having to wait so long to get a job. Well, I guess you have the novelty of choosing your job.

Arion: Are you implying that you don't really want to be a boom box... person?

Thursday: No, it's not that. It's just kind of weird how us Music Stars don't get any say in the matter.

Knight: Well, we're not really Music Stars unless we play music.

Thursday: True. But anyways... what should I name my son?

FKOD: How about Charles Farthington Von Dickinson IV?

Arion: That wouldn't even fit the 8 character limit!

Knight: Gosh, most humans don't have names that long.

Thursday: Uh... maybe I'll just use a name generator.

FKOD: You guys are no fun.

Arion: Wait, I got it. How about Martus?

Thursday: I like that!

FKOD: Mine was better.

Knight: Uh huh. So, when are we going to that Florida place?

Arion: Saturday.

FKOD: It'll be like, really early when we leave. You won't be awake for a few hours.

Thursday: *sigh* Wish I could go. Oh well, Martus will have fun. You guys better write me a letter about it.

Arion: Of course we will.

Knight: Is Florida like some exciting place or something?

FKOD: Well, where we're going is a bigger city, with tall buildings and stuff. And there's the ocean. I think you'd like the sea, it's pretty cool.

Knight: Oh. Okay. Why are you going?

FKOD: A lot of my family lives there. I don't get to see them often, ya know.

Arion: It'll be fun. I can't wait.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status:

Name: Arion

Gender: M

Character type: Samuraitchi

Gen: 19

Job: Silverware Matchfinder

V6 Status

Name: Martus

Gender: M

Character type: Mametchi

Gen: 17

Band: Victory

Instrument: DJ Table

V6 Status (Glam Rock)

Name: Knight

Gender: M

Character type: Kuromametchi

Gen: 6

Band: Quest

Instrument: Singers

FKOD: Oh hey guys, you weren't expecting an update now were you? But I have the interwebs right now, so... an update!

Arion: Wow, Florida is so... different.

Knight: Such a long drive... bluh.

Martus: It's so hot out there.

FKOD: Yeah, you guys stop complaining.

Arion: I wasn't complaining, I was just being observant.

Knight: Anyways... we haven't done a lot yet. Mostly hanging around.

FKOD: I can't feel like I've just been hanging around when I'm with my little niece Natalie. I swear she is on a permanent sugar rush or something.

Martus: She is bouncy. So, FKOD, will we get to see the sea?

FKOD: Maybe. I don't know when, though.

Arion: Wow, this update is actually pretty boring.

FKOD: Well... you know what? Your face is boring.

Knight: Wow, really?

Martus: That's the worst insult you could come up with?

FKOD: Your face is the worst insult you could come up with.

Arion: Uh... FKOD, look, a chicken with a fork!

FKOD: Where?

Knight: That should keep here busy for a while.

Martus: Oh gosh, but we don't have anything to do.

Arion: Guys. Guys. It's called the internet.

Knight: Better yet, it's called YouTube.

Martus: Yay, movies!

FKOD: The chicken was a lie! All I found was Monroe and my angry pollywhirl who is unofficially nicknamed Henchman.

Henchman: >:0

Ryyx: Unofficial nickname? How's an unofficial nickname different from an official one? In fact, how are nicknames at all official?

Arion: How did you get here?

Car: Ahem.

Knight: Oh yeah. That. Okay, but why did you come along, anyways?

Ryyx: I was curious about this Florida place.

FKOD: Are you sure that's why you came?

Ryyx: What are you talking about?

FKOD: -.-

Ryyx: What's with that face?

Martus: Why do you hang out with us? At best, we're rude to you, and at worst, we beat the snot out of you. If I were you, I'd go find new friends.

Ryyx: Well.... I was originally assigned to get rid of you guys, but....

Arion: You're incompetent?

Knight: You've grown attached to us in a weird sort of way?

Martus: You're spying on us.

Ryyx: Are you trying to get some psychological profile on me?

FKOD: Yes.

Ryyx: Well, anyways, I was fired two weeks ago.

Knight: Frankly, I'm not too surprised.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status:

Name: Arion

Gender: M

Character type: Samuraitchi

Gen: 19

Job: Child counter

V6 Status

Name: Martus

Gender: M

Character type: Mametchi

Gen: 17

Band: Victory

Instrument: DJ Table

V6 Status (Glam Rock)

Name: Knight

Gender: M

Character type: Kuromametchi

Gen: 6

Band: Quest

Instrument: Singers

Arion: Well, I got a new job today.

Martus: Why?

Arion: Well, I didn't have the reflexes to do my old job.

Knight: But shouldn't a samurai have decent reflexes?

Arion: I only look like a samurai.

Martus: Oh. So that's why you're cool with ninjas.

Knight: Eh?

Martus: Samurai and ninjas are mortal enemies.

FKOD: Like the mongoose and the snake, or Sonic the Hedgehog and the ocean.

Arion: I thought Sonic's worst enemy was Eggman.

FKOD: Yeah, but Eggman poses less of a threat.

Knight: Uh-huh.

FKOD: Anyways, I'm going to hang out with the cool kids. Or at least my bro and my mom.

Knight: Uh-huh.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status:

Name: Arion

Gender: M

Character type: Samuraitchi

Gen: 19

Job: Child counter

V6 Status

Name: Martus

Gender: M

Character type: Mametchi

Gen: 17

Band: Victory

Instrument: DJ Table

V6 Status (Glam Rock)

Name: Knight

Gender: M

Character type: Kuromametchi

Gen: 6

Band: Quest

Instrument: Singers

Arion: Hi everybody. Today I got married.

Knight: Uh, today I just hung out with FKOD.

Martus: Yeah.

FKOD: We went shopping today!

Ryyx: Is that why you're wearing that unusual hat?

FKOD: It's not unusual. It's a coolie hat. Haven't you ever seen a coolie hat before?

Arion: It's not exactly something a lot of people in this area wear.

Martus: I think it's cool.

Knight: It's cooler than the scratch I got on my screen. Ugh.

FKOD: It's one big scratch too. It looks like your a retired gladiator or something.

Knight: Yeah. But it's not as cool as a real scar.

Ryyx: Scars aren't cool, they're a painful reminder of pains long past.

FKOD: Stop talking emo kid.

Martus: So, FKOD, how's your sunburn?

FKOD: Bluh. It stinks not being able to carry my purse over my shoulders.

Ryyx: Why didn't you wear sunscreen?

FKOD: I am normally resilient to assaults from the Wretched Day Star, but I'm obviously not immune.

Arion: Man I'm glad I don't have to deal with that.

Martus: I'm surprise Ryyx hasn't been sunburnt.

Knight: Dude, he doesn't ever wear short sleeves or anything. How could he get sunburns?

Ryyx: There's also the fact that I have spent very little time inside.

Arion: Well, I'm glad I don't have to deal with that kind of thing.

Martus: Um... we could still melt if we sit out in the sun long enough.

Knight: It doesn't matter what the weather is outside, we just can't deal with it.

Martus: Too bad we can't go swimming.

FKOD: Yay swimming. So, are you guys excited to see more dogs?

Arion: Are these ones going to lick me?

FKOD: Idunno. I'll just keep you in the purse so you guys don't get an unneeded bath, okay?

Martus: Can't we just see more babies? They just scream a little.

FKOD: There are no more newborns, sorry. I don't know if we'll get to see Alex and Andy again, anyway.

Ryyx: I have no idea what you people are talking about.

Knight: FKOD's cousin's girlfriend had a baby, and we got to see her yesterday. Human babies are kind of funny looking.

Arion: I know, right? All wrinkly and pink.

FKOD: And the dogs that decided that Arion was in need of a bath were my sister's dogs, and we're going to see my aunt's dogs tomorrow.

Ryyx: Ah. You've been busy, eh?

FKOD: Yup. Hard to believe it's Wednesday already. Time is weird.

Arion: Time isn't strange, it's just your perception of it.

FKOD: Hey, I did not ask you for samurai wisdom.

Martus: But he's not a samurai.

Knight: Shhhhh.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status:

Name: Mort

Gender: M

Character type: Kuchitamatchi

Gen: 20

Job: Show-off

V6 Status

Name: Martus

Gender: M

Character type: Mametchi

Gen: 17

Band: Victory

Instrument: DJ Table

V6 Status (Glam Rock)

Name: Knight

Gender: M

Character type: Kuromametchi

Gen: 6

Band: Quest

Instrument: Singers

Martus: Hi guys, sorry it's been a while.

Knight: We've been pretty busy.

Mort: Or at least FKOD has with all her swimming. I wanna swim.

Martus: No, you can't. Water isn't so good for us.

Knight: It's a shame, really.

FKOD: Guys, it's almost dinner time!

Mort: Yay, food!

FKOD: Well, it's my dinner anyway.

Mort: :[

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status:

Name: Mort

Gender: M

Character type: Kuchitamatchi

Gen: 20

Job: Show-off

V6 Status

Name: Martus

Gender: M

Character type: Mametchi

Gen: 17

Band: Victory

Instrument: DJ Table

V6 Status (Glam Rock)

Name: Knight

Gender: M

Character type: Kuromametchi

Gen: 6

Band: Quest

Instrument: Singers

Knight: Okay FKOD has finished eating dinner and goofing off on YouTube, let's do an actual update.

Martus: And we have some exciting news!

Knight: We got married!

Ryyx: Aren't you two related?

Martus: We meant that we both have wives now, jeez.

Knight: That should have been obvious.

Martus: Seriously.

Knight: I know.

Martus: Dude.

FKOD: Okay, annoying Ryyx is fun and all, but you have other things to say.

Penny (Martus's wife): You could start by, say, introducing us.

Elaine (Knight's wife): That would be nice.

Martus: But... we were annoying Ryyx.

Ryyx: That's a pathetic excuse for not treating your loved ones with the respect they deserve.

FKOD: Oh, that was a nice one, Ryyx.

Ryyx: A nice what exactly?

Knight: Don't pay any mind to that.

Elaine: Don't act as if you're not in trouble too!

Knight: But I'm cool and rational.

Martus: I'm not! Help me!

Mort: What are you guys doing? Why are Penny and Elly mad? Why is FKOD looking at YouTube like that?

FKOD: I think I've seen things mortals were not meant to see.

Mort: Oh. So what's going on here?

FKOD: I've never heard this song. What is with all these Furbies. What is going on in this I don't even.

Mort: Oh, I meant those guys, FKOD. What are they doing?

FKOD: Uh. Idunno. Something about annoying Ryyx.

Mort: Okay. Hi Penny. Hi Elly.

Penny: Sorry, Mort, but we're seething in anger and are very busy.

Mort: 'Kay. Hi Marty. Hi Knight.

Martus: We're busy-- Ow! That's my face! I'm using that!

Knight: Well, it'll heal... Um... Elaine... what's that?

Mort: It looks like a Sharpie. Are we coloring?

FKOD: What is this. What hath science wrought.

Martus: Flee! Fly you fools!

FKOD: Yeah, I should get off of YouTube. Capital idea, old chap.

Mort: He wasn't talking to you.

FKOD: Huh?

Knight: No! I don't need a mustache!

Martus: Stop it! I don't want a monicle!

FKOD: Oh. Hey guys. How's it goin'?

Mort: I don't think they're happy.

FKOD: Oh man, this is what is called a Kodak moment. Lemme get the camera.

Knight: What about cameras?

Martus: This had better not go on the internet.

Ryyx: Well... the event is being recorded for all to read about.

Penny: Which makes this more fun! <3

Elaine: Mwahahahah!

FKOD: Everybody smile! :3

Mort: :]

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls):

Name: Mort

Gender: M

Character type: Uratogetchi

Gen: 20

Job: Fabulous Hair Stylist

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Taire

Gender: F

Character type: Urayoungvioletchi

Gen: 1

Job: Sparkliness professional

V6 Status (Blue bars):

Name: Aurum

Gender: M

Character type: Kuromametchi

Gen: 18

Band: Wanderer

Instrument: Tinpani

V6 Status (Glam Rock)

Name: Silver

Gender: M

Character type: Mametchi

Gen: 7

Band: Blades

Instrument: Karaoke

FKOD: Okay, the lack of updates in the past few days was caused by a lack of internet access. But here I am! And, if you would direct your attention to the stats above, you may notice I am in possession of a new V4.5.

Taire: That's me!

Aurum: So do we have any more exciting news?

Silver: Any at all?

FKOD: Uh. Well. I think I'm supposed to go home tomorrow.

Ryyx: Weren't you only supposed to be here for a week?

FKOD: Well, we ended up staying longer.

Mort: Well, if FKOD didn't stay longer than a week, I wouldn't have a new friend.

Taire: Yay friendship!

Mort: And I guess I can forgive her for giving me terrible things in her childhood.

Taire: ...I don't remember that.

Mort: Of course you don't. Oh hey I got mail.

Silver: Me too!

Aurum: So did I!

Taire: Yay, I got a heart!

Aurum: The king gave me a present!

Mort: >:|

Silver: >:|

Taire: Whatcha got?

Mort: Snake.

Silver: Feces.

Taire: What are feces?

Aurum: They're the physical excretions that result from the digestion of food.

Taire: ...Oh, so it's poo.

FKOD: Okay, I'm guessing I need to take care of you guys, then. My niece is bugging me to get on the computer anyway.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls):

Name: Mort

Gender: M

Character type: Uratogetchi

Gen: 20

Job: Macho Weight Puller

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Taire

Gender: F

Character type: Uramemetchi

Gen: 1

Job: Sparkliness professional

V6 Status (Blue bars):

Name: Aurum

Gender: M

Character type: Kuromametchi

Gen: 18

Band: Wanderer

Instrument: Tinpani

V6 Status (Glam Rock)

Name: Silver

Gender: M

Character type: Mametchi

Gen: 7

Band: Blades

Instrument: Karaoke

FKOD: We're home again!

Taire: :/

Mort: Somethin' wrong, Taire?

Taire: It doesn't feel like home to me. I don't even have parents who lived here.

Silver: Oh, boo hoo.

Taire: You want another scratch on your screen, buddy?

Silver: Heh, I'd like to see you try with those scrawny little arms.

Mort: Well, I wouldn't be so quick to judge by appearances.

Aurum: You two should get along. We're more or less like roommates anyway.

Taire: Well, your cousin or whatever is being a total jerk.

Silver: It takes one to know one.

Ryyx: Hm, that's a pretty generic comeback. You could come up with something better.

Aurum: Ryyx, don't encourage him!

Silver: Ryyx, you can shut your face or I will shut it for you.

Ryyx: Heard that one before too, actually.

Mort: Um, Aurum be still or I'll drop the ro--

Silver: OW. THERE IS A LARGE BOULDER ON TOP OF ME.

Taire: Well, lift it off with your macho not-stick arms. >:]

Silver: >:[

Mort: Gosh, I'm so sorry!

Aurum: No, it's my fault...

Ryyx: Wait... I'm not to one being injured this update? Yeeesssssssss.

Silver: When I get out from under here, I'm going to kick your butt, Ryyx.

Ryyx: Maybe you should just leave him down there.

Taire: I second that notion.

Aurum: You guys are mean.

Taire: He's meaner!

Ryyx: No I'm not.

Taire: I was talking about Silver.

Ryyx: ...I knew that.

Mort: *lifts boulder* Are you okay?

Silver: I know what it's like to be a pancake now.

FKOD: Pancakes? Where?

Silver: *groan*

FKOD: Oh, flat people, not edible Frisbees. Darn.

Aurum: Oh... FKOD, you're not mad, are you?

FKOD: At what? Ryyx?

Ryyx: I didn't do anything.

FKOD: But did you really not do anything?

Ryyx: I wouldn't lie to you would I?

FKOD: But would you really not lie to me?

Ryyx: It was the tamagotchi things! I didn't do anything this time! No DVDs were involved!

FKOD: Mmhmm.

Ryyx: It involved a rock and the dropping of the aforementioned rock.

Taire: Do you really have to blurt out all this when FKOD was here to witness this the whole time?

Ryyx: Was she?

Mort: Up until I lifted the boulder off of Silver, she was paying attention.

FKOD: Yeah I pretended to have no idea what you were talking about to confuse you. Then I was distracted by a narwhal with a vest conducting the Fifth Symphony.

Aurum: Um...

FKOD: It was in a parallel dimension. Only I could see it.

Taire: Right, well, let's just call it a day then. FKOD is a bit tired today, what with the waking up at four o'clock in the morning and all.

FKOD: Now the narwhal is juggling dinosaurs with chainsa--

Mort: Good night!

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls):

Name: Mort

Gender: M

Character type: Uratogetchi

Gen: 20

Job: Macho Weight Puller

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Taire

Gender: F

Character type: Uramemetchi

Gen: 1

Job: Confection Claw Machine Operator

V6 Status (Blue bars):

Name: Aurum

Gender: M

Character type: Kuromametchi

Gen: 18

Band: Wanderer

Instrument: Tinpani

V6 Status (Glam Rock)

Name: Silver

Gender: M

Character type: Mametchi

Gen: 7

Band: Blades

Instrument: Karaoke

Aurum: Hey Silver, are you feeling better today?

Silver: Yeah.

Mort: Well, it's a good thing this place operates on cartoon physics.

Taire: How does that work?

FKOD: You don't want to know. It involves lots of pocket dimensions and a few bunnies.

Aurum: Sounds complicated.

Silver: Well, I guess we're a lot safer with this cartoon stuff.

Ryyx: Indeed. So...

FKOD: Dinner time!

Taire: Noooo wait!

FKOD: But I smell food!

Taire: But I need to announce that I got a job!

Aurum: Well, it's right up there in your status, you know.

Taire: Oh yeah. That's right.

Dr. Blobagus: Oh there you are, FKOD.

FKOD: I've been here for a while and you just noticed me?

Dr. Blobagus: I have something important to discuss with you.

FKOD: But... dinner.

Dr. Blobagus: Okay, have your food, but this can't wait much longer.

Silver: Who's that guy?

Aurum: :/

FKOD: Om nom nom.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls):

Name: Mort

Gender: M

Character type: Uratogetchi

Gen: 20

Job: Macho Weight Puller

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Taire

Gender: F

Character type: Uramemetchi

Gen: 1

Job: Confection Claw Machine Operator

V6 Status (Blue bars):

Name: Aurum

Gender: M

Character type: Kuromametchi

Gen: 18

Band: Wanderer

Instrument: Tinpani

V6 Status (Glam Rock)

Name: Silver

Gender: M

Character type: Mametchi

Gen: 7

Band: Blades

Instrument: Karaoke

FKOD: Okay what's up Blobagus.

Dr. Blobagus: Did... did it take you 4 hours to eat your dinner?

FKOD: No, I had stuff to work on.

Dr. Blobagus: Well, anyways, Teysa was kidnapped.

Ryyx: What?

FKOD: Huh?

Taire: Who?

Mort: Who's the culprit?

Dr. Blobagus: None other than Dr. Dorle M. Marterson, my archenemy.

Aurum: So why did he do that?

Dr. Blobagus: Oh, who knows, he's a mad scientist! He has a bear-human hybrid and a bunny man as his lackeys! He likes to mess with all sorts of genetic things!

Silver: A bear-human hybrid? Cool.

FKOD: So... have you tried to mount a rescue mission?

Dr. Blobagus: Well, the Tiny Vigilante Squad was busy with some oil spill in some golf or something like that, and the other capable fighters around here were injured by Dorle's minions. He's not to be underestimated.

Taire: So what should we do?

FKOD: My Pokemon didn't get involved in the earlier fight, did they?

Dr. Blobagus: Nope.

FKOD: Well, there's a small army right there.

Ryyx: But if we're up against such strong opponents, then shouldn't we try espionage instead?

Aurum: Yeah, then we'd be less likely to get hurt.

Silver: But if we're caught, we'll get our butts handed to us.

Mort: That saying always puts an unpleasant image in my mind...

FKOD: Here's a compromise: my guys can distract Dorle and his lackeys while you guys sneak in.

Taire: Wait, we're doing the sneaking?

Ryyx: You're smaller and less noticeable.

Silver: I better start my ninja training then.

Aurum: I hope we're well prepared for this...

FKOD: We'll take some time to rest and prepare, don't worry.

Ryyx: What will I do?

FKOD: Idunno.

Dr. Blobagus: It's not like you really do much of anything anyway.

Ryyx: ...

FKOD: Do you see the narwhal too?

Ryyx: No. I'm just thinking of a way to make Dr. Blobagus suffer.

FKOD: You wanna know what Blobagus hates? *whisper whisper*

Ryyx: Really?

FKOD: Yeah.

Ryyx: Where can I get one?

FKOD: *secrets*

Ryyx: Darn it.

Mort: Hm, I wonder what those two are talking about.

Silver: Dark secrets, I guess.

Aurum: You guys don't have to be so nosy. I imagine they're talking about the infiltration of Dorle's... uh... base?

Taire: No, they're finding ways to annoy Blobagus. I think they mentioned--

FKOD: Shhhh.

Taire: Sorry.

A few days ago, on the coast of the Gulf of Mexico...

Tiny Optimus Prime: Hey guys, I found another bird.

Chibi Ichigo Kurosaki: Man, this bites. Shouldn't we be fighting crime or something like that?

Mini Cthulhu: *eldritch yeah I know, right?*

TOP: This is a crime... a crime against nature.

CIK: Why don't we just beat up some BP guys or something?

MC: *eldritch hey guys I got a call on my cellphone*

TOP: Who is it?

MC: *eldritch oh it's that Blobagus guy again*

TOP: Eh, just let it ring, we have birds to clean.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls):

Name: Mort

Gender: M

Character type: Uratogetchi

Gen: 20

Job: Macho Weight Puller

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Taire

Gender: F

Character type: Uramemetchi

Gen: 1

Job: Confection Claw Machine Operator

V6 Status (Blue bars):

Name: Aurum

Gender: M

Character type: Kuromametchi

Gen: 18

Band: Wanderer

Instrument: Tinpani

V6 Status (Glam Rock)

Name: Silver

Gender: M

Character type: Mametchi

Gen: 7

Band: Blades

Instrument: Karaoke

FKOD: Okay, tomorrow we will infiltrate Dorle's base.

Mort: Where is it?

FKOD: ...Idunno.

Taire: Wow, this is going nowhere fast.

Dr. Blobagus: Wait, I think I found it on this Google Earth thing. See... right there.

FKOD: Uh... zoom out...

Dr. Blobagus: Okay.

Aurum: That's the moon!

Silver: What's that doing on Google Earth?

Dr. Blobagus: Oh, wait, this is... some other thing. I just Googled it, so I thought it was Google Earth.

Mort: Okay. But what about those of us who have kids? Who'll watch over them?

Silver: Uh. Idunno. My wife is coming along, since she's a ninja and can be sneaky and all.

Kunoitchi: The proper term for a female ninja is kunoichi.

Silver: Well, sorry.

Ryyx: Well, I'm not going... so I guess I'm stuck as the babysitter.

Taire: Well, it could be worse. You could have to look after human babies.

Ryyx: True.

Silver: Anyways, I think I'll name my kid Arissa, which, just for your information, is Greek for best.

Mort: Oh hey, here's a good five-letter one, Kiril. It means--

Silver: Woah, dude, I'm the one giving my kid the greek name. You can find some other language to get a name from.

Mort: But... Kiril is a cool name.

Taire: Yeah, Silver, stop being a jerk.

Silver: You stop being a jerk.

Taire: No, you stop being a jerk.

Kunoitchi: Why don't you both stop being jerks?

FKOD: Why don't I stop being a jerk?

Taire: Wait, what?

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls):

Name: Kiril

Gender: M

Character type: Kujakutchi

Gen: 21

Job: FLOWER POWER

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Chime

Gender: F

Character type: Urayoungmarotchi

Gen: 2

Job: Still in preschool, awaiting mail...

V6 Status (Blue bars):

Name: Osiris

Gender: M

Character type: Kuchitamatchi

Gen: 19

Band: N/A

Instrument: DJ Table

V6 Status (Glam Rock)

Name: Arissa

Gender: F

Character type: Ichigotchi

Gen: 8

Band: Best

Instrument: Trumpet

FKOD: Sorry about the lack of updates, my internet went kaboom for a couple of days. The good news is that we rescued Teysa.

Teysa: The bad news is that my arm was stolen. I really wish I had that still. That was my favorite arm.

Kiril: You could tie a stick onto yourself where the arm used to be.

Arissa: Surely sticks are one of the greatest advancements in the scientific field of prosthetic technology.

Chime: Wouldn't a robot arm be better though?

Osiris: It'd be cooler.

Dr. Blobagus: That's not our biggest problem. Can you imagine what Dorle will do with that arm?

Kiril: ...He'll hit us with it?

Dr. Blobagus: Worse than that. We're dooooomed.

FKOD: Uh huh.

Dr. Blobagus: I'm so totally serious about this.

FKOD: Uh huh.

Dr. Blobagus: We must take action immediately.

FKOD: Uh huh.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls):

Name: Kiril

Gender: M

Character type: Yasaguretchi (he has a pompadour!)

Gen: 21

Job: Industrial Flower Machine Operator

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Chime

Gender: F

Character type: Horoyotchi

Gen: 2

Job: Transportation Vehicle Motorist

V6 Status (Blue bars):

Name: Osiris

Gender: M

Character type: Mametchi

Gen: 19

Band: RealLife

Instrument: DJ Table

V6 Status (Glam Rock)

Name: Arissa

Gender: F

Character type: Chantochi

Gen: 8

Band: Best

Instrument: Trumpet

Kiril: Okay, everyone, let's spin the wheel of excuses for not updating!

FKOD: Okay, smarty-pants, zip it.

Chime: Besides, we don't need a wheel, because there's only one thing FKOD has been doing for the past few days!

Arissa: She's been playing some game on her laptop!

Osiris: Well, to be perfectly fair, there's been one day where we went shopping.

Kiril: But that's only one day, and it's not like we went shopping from sunrise to sundown. She could have updated.

FKOD: In my defense, it's an addictive game.

Dr. Blobagus: Anyways, Dorle has Teysa's arm. Discuss.

FKOD: Eh. Let the Tiny Vigilante Squad handle it.

Ryyx: They're not here.

FKOD: Make another Tiny Vigilante Squad.

Diminutive Droideka: HEY MEATBAGS.

Chime: Well, there's one. But we need more tiny versions of famous characters.

DD: I SHOULD BE ADEQUATE FOR THIS MISSION. I MEAN LOOK AT ME. I HAVE LASER CANNONS FOR ARMS. I HAVE A SHIELD TOO.

Arissa: Eh, I've seen enough Star Wars: Battlefront to know that you guys aren't immortal.

DD: :[

Osiris: Aw, Arissa, you hurt his feelings.

??????: Oh, having trouble, are we?

Ryyx: Aparus?

Aparus: No. I'm quite obviously David Bowie.

FKOD: Are you.... floating in a tin can far above the world?

Aparus: Planet Earth is blue and there is nothing I can do.

Kiril: Am I missing something here?

FKOD: Only David Bowie.

Aparus: Anyways, enough of that. I've come to offer my assistance.

DD: ERROR. YOU ARE NOT A SMALLER VERSION OF A CHARACTER.

Ryyx: Does that matter? I'll have you know he's a particularly powerful Niriphale.

Chime: What does he do?

Ryyx: ...I'd rather you not speak of him as if he was some sort of monkey that does tricks. You see--

Aparus: Ryyx. There's no need to defend me. I am quite capable of holding my own in a debate.

Arissa: Well, we're used to Ryyx's incompetence, so we don't know what to expect of you.

Aparus: Hahaha, I see.

FKOD: Maybe we should discuss this tomorrow? I need to go to bed.

Aparus: But of course.

Dr. Blobagus: We've done enough waiting!

FKOD: Yeah, yeah, we've heard it before.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls):

Name: Kiril

Gender: M

Character type: Yasaguretchi

Gen: 21

Job: Industrial Flower Machine Operator

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Chime

Gender: F

Character type: Horoyotchi

Gen: 2

Job: Transportation Vehicle Motorist

V6 Status (Blue bars):

Name: Osiris

Gender: M

Character type: Mametchi

Gen: 19

Band: RealLife

Instrument: DJ Table

V6 Status (Glam Rock)

Name: Arissa

Gender: F

Character type: Chantochi

Gen: 8

Band: Best

Instrument: Trumpet

FKOD: Okay. So--

Kiril: Hang on, I bet this is going to be a long update with lots of boring explanations.

Chime: And we have some news to share.

Kiril: Chime and I got married! <3

Chime: And we have 2 daughters.

Osiris: Congratulations!

Arissa: D'aww.

Dr. Blobagus: Hey, we can't put this off any longer!

Arissa: But.... babies. They're so cute! <3

Dr. Blobagus: Fine. I'll deal with this myself.

Aparus: Alright then. See you later.

Dr. Blobagus: What, you aren't going to help?

Aparus: :]

Dr. Blobagus: Okay then? I'm going. You can't stop me.

Aparus: ...

FKOD: It's about time.

Ryyx: Oh, we're finally rid of him now?

FKOD: Oh, you'll see why I wanted him to go. You'll see.

Kiril: Eh?

FKOD: You'll see.

Ryyx: I seem to be unaware of something here.

Aparus: Any minute now.

Chime: Eh?

Kiril: What are we waiting for?

*KABOOM*

FKOD: There we go.

Osiris: Isn't that base on the moon though? There's no way he could have gotten there so quickly! And we wouldn't hear the explosion, since sound can't travel through space!

Arissa: Ahem. Cartoon physics.

Osiris: Oh... It still doesn't make much sense.

Aparus: Not much does.

Kiril: So...

Chime: What now?

FKOD: I'm going to play...

Arissa: FKOD!

FKOD: :[

Arissa: At least let that guy introduce himself properly!

FKOD: Oh yeah, who the heck are you?

Aparus: I am Aparus, the prime servant of the Arkrinth Esthis and Ryyx's former mentor.

FKOD: Rewind to that Arkrinth bit, sir.

Aparus: Esthis, the Frozen Witch. She has betrayed the Arkrinths to pursue her own goals.

FKOD: Oh, so that means we don't have don't have to be mortal enemies then? The Arkrinths and I have never really been on good terms.

Aparus: Ah, so you know some of the Arkrinths?

Kiril: I don't!

Chime: It's hard to keep up with this stuff.

Osiris: We only hang around for a week or so before getting married and heading for our own planet.

Arissa: What does this all have to do with the log anyways?

Kiril: Yeah! We're supposed to be the stars!

Arissa: Get your own blog or something!

Ryyx: But our presence is really the only distinguishing factor this log has.

Osiris: Hey, we have... uh....

Ryyx: Exactly my point. >:]

FKOD: Pfft, distinguished is my middle name. Well, not really, I have no middle name. But we have... the Tiny Vigilante Squad! And Monroe! And Mr. Margleton!

Ryyx: None of them are here right now.

FKOD: Oh... right.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls):

Name: Ash

Gender: F

Character type: Urayoungmemetchi

Gen: 22

Job: [ ] (tilt your head 90 degrees too the left)

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Echo

Gender: F

Character type: Urayoungmarotchi

Gen: 3

Job: It's harder to make that fisticuffs symbol with just a few characters!

V6 Status (Blue bars):

Name: Cassidy

Gender: F

Character type: Tamatchi

Gen: 20

Band: N/A

Instrument: Saxophone

V6 Status (Glam Rock)

Name: Eriines

Gender: F

Character type: Hitodetchi

Gen: 9

Band: N/A

Instrument: Headphones

FKOD: Ooooooh!

Echo: What?

FKOD: Just readin' 'bout this new Tama-Go. Looks pretty cool.

Eriines: Ah, just as I thought. You're think of replacing us.

FKOD: Pfft no. I think 4 is the maximum number of tamas I can deal with, but if I have to, I can temporarily deactivate a couple of you.

Ash: D-deactivate?

FKOD: Temporarily.

Cassidy: Still... seems kind of scary.

FKOD: I'd only leave a couple of you out of the waking world for a while, then I'd cycle you out.

Ash: C-cycle?

FKOD: Heeeeeeey, don't blame me for not being some kind of crazy multitasker. Four is almost too much!

Eriines: Nuh-uh. Four is great. It's a great number, and your greater for having four of us.

Echo: FKOD, don't sweat it. I don't mind if I get deactivated for a while.

FKOD: Well, I'm not deactivating any of you right now, just when I get my next tamagotchi.

Cassidy: Oh, okay. Phew!

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls):

Name: Ash

Gender: F

Character type: Urayoungmemetchi

Gen: 22

Job: [ ] (tilt your head 90 degrees too the left)

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Echo

Gender: F

Character type: Urayoungmarotchi

Gen: 3

Job: It's harder to make that fisticuffs symbol with just a few characters!

V6 Status (Blue bars):

Name: Cassidy

Gender: F

Character type: Chamametchi

Gen: 20

Band: Blizzard

Instrument: Saxophone

V6 Status (Glam Rock)

Name: Eriines

Gender: F

Character type: Chamametchi

Gen: 9

Band: Change

Instrument: Headphones

FKOD: I went to another town today and saw a few friends and went shopping and stuff! And now I have a headache. Bluuuuuh.

Eriines: Well, why don't you take some asprin or whatever you humans do when your head hurts.

FKOD: I don't trust modern medicine.

Echo: Well, maybe if you focus on something else, you won't notice the pain as much.

FKOD: I was reading for a while, but it didn't help since the protagonist had a pounding headache from being hit in the head by a baseball bat by a guy--

Cassidy: Don't spoil the story!

FKOD: I didn't even tell you what book I was reading!

Ash: Speaking of stories... I'd like to hear a story, FKOD.

FKOD: Oh, okay. Hey, maybe I'll illustrate it with this freestyle Etch A Sketch I found at a thrift shop today.

Echo: That sounds fun!

FKOD: Okay, here we go. So, you see, there's this field, right here. With a hill on it. On the field, there's this horse. See it?

Eriines: Looks more like a donkey to me.

FKOD: Shhh, it's a horse. Anyways, there's all this grass in the field. Tall, delicious grass.

Cassidy: It looks like a bunch of zigzag scribbles.

FKOD: What do you think I'm working with here? Paint? Crayons? Photoshop? Geez. Anyways, this grass looks pretty darn tasty to the horse. You know, it's a horse. They love that stuff.

Ash: What happens next?

FKOD: Well, there's this hermit. On the hill, right there.

Echo: He looks really mad.

FKOD: Yes. He protects the grass in the field, and he's not so happy with that horse eating it. So he takes out this staff he has.

Eriines: It looks like a big plank. Is he planning on starting his next construction project or something?

FKOD: No. That is his big staff and he zaps the horse with lightning.

Ash: I-is the horse okay?

FKOD: Oh yeah. He's just... shocked.

Eriines: You didn't just make an awful pun.

FKOD: Yeah, that pun made my headache worse. Anyway, the horse developed an irrational fear of fields and always ate at restaurants from then on. The end.

Cassidy: Well... I'm not sure whether that was a happy ending because the horse was okay or a sad ending because the horse developed a crippling phobia.

Echo: It was... a bittersweet ending.

Eriines: That was the weirdest story I've ever heard... not that I've heard many stories in my two days of existence.

Ash: Um... are horses even allowed in restaurants?

FKOD: It's a story, who said it had to make sense?

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls):

Name: Ash

Gender: F

Character type: Purimatchi

Gen: 22

Job: [ ] (tilt your head 90 degrees too the left)

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Echo

Gender: F

Character type: Urazukyutchi

Gen: 3

Job: It's harder to make that fisticuffs symbol with just a few characters!

V6 Status (Blue bars):

Name: Cassidy

Gender: F

Character type: Chantotchi

Gen: 20

Band: Blizzard

Instrument: Saxophone

V6 Status (Glam Rock)

Name: Eriines

Gender: F

Character type: Mimitchi

Gen: 9

Band: Change

Instrument: Headphones

FKOD: So, I watched the new Alice In Wonderland and some fireworks tonight.

Eriines: Isn't the Fourth of July tomorrow?

FKOD: Eh. Mom already got everything out, so...

Echo: Um... weren't fireworks invented in China?

Cassidy: Well, I'm pretty sure everything is made in China.

Ash: Even tamagotchis.

FKOD: Anyways, I think it's time for shameless advertising!

Cassidy: What are we advertising?

Echo: Kaboom?

Ash: The Slap Chop?

Eriines: ShamWow?

FKOD: Nope. Fanfiction. To be more specific, my fanfic!

Eriines: Pfft. I'd rather do an infomercial about something else.

FKOD: But.... it's fanfictiony.

Ash: What's it about?

FKOD: Hm. I don't want to spoil anything. It involves supermarkets.

Echo: Supermarkets aren't too terribly interesting.

FKOD: But... mine is. And it's totally not a rip-off of Wal-Mart.

Cassidy: Now that you mention it... this sounds like the Wal-Mart we have.

FKOD: No it doesn't. Hey, you read it?

Cassidy: Yeah. I watched you write it.

Ryyx: FKOD, I thought you hated writing.

FKOD: Yeah. But... I figured I could do better with no due dates or not having to write an essay. This is not an essay. Totally not. It is fanfic.

Eriines: Yeah, we get it.

FKOD: But do you really get it?

Eriines: >:|

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls):

Name: Ash

Gender: F

Character type: Purimatchi

Gen: 22

Job: Talk Show Host

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Echo

Gender: F

Character type: Urazukyutchi

Gen: 3

Job: Fights Fires

V6 Status (Blue bars):

Name: Cassidy

Gender: F

Character type: Chantotchi

Gen: 20

Band: Blizzard

Instrument: Saxophone

V6 Status (Glam Rock)

Name: Eriines

Gender: F

Character type: Mimitchi

Gen: 9

Band: Change

Instrument: Headphones

Cassidy: Well, we sure didn't update yesterday.

Eriines: Let's all blame FKOD. She's in charge of updating anyways.

FKOD: Pft. It's not like anything too important happened yesterday.

Echo: Yeah-huh, Ash and I got jobs! And you finished that apron you were making!

Ash: And you updated your comic.

FKOD: Okay, besides that, nothing important.

Cassidy: You haven't done anything today.

FKOD: I read some stuff and doodled a little. That's not nothing.

Echo: Double negative, FKOD.

FKOD: Your not a spell checker, stop checking my spelling and grammar errors.

Eriines: So, do you have anything that your going to do today in mind?

FKOD: I was going to be useless and play video games.

Cassidy: We're glad your going to do something with yourself, then.

Ash: Well, it's summer. I guess it's okay to be a bit lazy.

 

[FKOD]

V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls):

Name: Ash

Gender: F

Character type: Purimatchi

Gen: 22

Job: Talk Show Host

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Echo

Gender: F

Character type: Urazukyutchi

Gen: 3

Job: Fights Fires

V6 Status (Blue bars):

Name: Cassidy

Gender: F

Character type: Chantotchi

Gen: 20

Band: Blizzard

Instrument: Saxophone

V6 Status (Glam Rock)

Name: Eriines

Gender: F

Character type: Mimitchi

Gen: 9

Band: Change

Instrument: Headphones

FKOD: I just noticed we have over a thousand views.

Cassidy: Must... resist urge... to make.... DBZ joke...

FKOD: It's just a shame that my fanfic only has five views right now.

Echo: Well, I highly doubt that your story is going to get a ton of views in a short time. After all, this log has been around for several months, and that story has been up for a couple of days.

Ash: When are you going to start the next chapter, FKOD?

FKOD: When I feel like it. I'll probably wait until I have fans yearning for more so I have some incentive.

Ash: Aww, so I'll have to wait several months to see what happens next?

FKOD: Hey, what makes you think it'll take that long!? My fame stat is higher than it used to be, and I think if I do some escort missions-- oops, been playing too many nerdy roguelike games.

Eriine: Oh great, now you can't separate fantasy from reality.

Cassidy: I thought you only played the one game.

FKOD: And that's almost too much!

Echo: Is it time for an intervention?

FKOD: Nooo, I refuse to be intervened. I think it's time for... a distraction.

Ash: To distract yourself from the game?

FKOD: No, to distract you guys from my game. Hey Cassidy, I don't mean to pick on you, but you have yet to get a pro debut. How does that make you feel on the inside?

Cassidy: Uh, I'll have you know that I have some part time jobs. I'm making ends meet here, FKOD.

Eriines: You know, if you actually practiced, you would be able to make enough money to swim around in it like Scrooge McDuck.

Cassidy: Well, okay, I think I have a judging thingy to go to right now, wish me luck!

A few minutes later...

Echo: And you know, that building can never be put out. I swear that it's the only building that catches on fire in the whole town, no one even lives inside--

Cassidy: I'm back! And victorious!

Eriines: Good, we don't have to listen to Echo's ranting anymore!

Echo: I wasn't ranting.

Ash: Congratulations, Cassidy!

Eriines: Big woop, I got the debut before she did.

Echo: I seriously wasn't ranting.

Cassidy: Yeah well, Eriines, just be glad I did it. Otherwise, you would have to take care of me.

Eriines: Hey, you said you were making ends meet! You have enough money for food! Jeez.

Echo: That was not a rant.

Cassidy: Oh, look, someone sent me a star. <3 I bet it's a star of congratulations!

Ash: That's nice. So, what will you do now?

FKOD: Let's. Play. Some games. :3

Eriines: Aren't you going to do anything else?

FKOD: I caught up on a bunch of comics this morning.

Echo: That doesn't count, you have nothing to show for it.

FKOD: I... I have knowledge!

Cassidy: Yeah?

FKOD: Yeah. Totally.

Eriines: Well?

FKOD: Hang on. I am searching my memory for a sparkling jewel of wisdom.

Ash: ...

FKOD: Hang on. Almost there. Oh hey, Ryyx and Aparus are gone.

Eriines: Really, FKOD? You just noticed? They've been gone for a few days now.

FKOD: Oh.

Cassidy: Yeah.

FKOD: Well... hey, all the guys are gone...

Ash: Where's Teysa?

FKOD: He's looking for a new arm. So ladies, let's gossip. <3

Echo: So.

Cassidy: I heard some things.

Eriines: Oh really?

Ash: What did you hear?

Cassidy: I heard... that FKOD likes Mudkips.

FKOD: Well you heard right.

Cassidy: Oh really?

FKOD: Yeah really.

Eriines: Okay, this is stupid.

Echo: Or so I heard, anyways.

Ash: I'm not sure if I like gossiping.

FKOD: Yeah, that was a silly idea, and I'm all the sillier for coming up with it.

Cassidy: Let's never speak of this again.

Eriines: You know, Cassidy, this is going on the internet until this topic fades from the forums.

Cassidy: ...Darn it.