The Amazing Adventures of a Tamagotchi

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V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Vivo

Gender: M

Character type: Uramametchi

Age: 6 years

Gen: 51

Job: Balloon Catcher

Status: Tell us about it, Gaia

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Mort

Gender: M

Character type: Samuratchi

Age: 6 years

Gen: 9

Job: Banker

Status: You know, the numbers thing

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Demetria

Gender: F

Character type: Mikazukitchi

Age: 1

Gen: 22

Friendship: 4/6

Status: Don't get too full of yourself

FKOD: Logging, logging, logging! Man it is so crazy to be logging again.

Ramada: Wait, you're logging again?

FKOD: Well yeah. Didn't you notice the tamagotchis?

Ramada: Yeah. I just didn't know you were logging again.

FKOD: The log and the tamagotchis go together, Ramada, like bread and butter.

Kinene: So did you stop playing with your tamagotchis to put your log on hold?

FKOD: Yeah, I guess.

Airon: So, how's your homework coming this weekend?

FKOD: ...Does contemplating it count as progress?

Airon: Not really.

FKOD: Airon, why do you expect me to live up to your high standards all the time! Oh right, you're a one! Pft.

Airon: I'm a what?

Mort: It's the numbers thing.

Vivo: Right, Gaia never told us about that!

FKOD: Oh right. Where's Ryyx, he wanted me to tell him about that.

Airon: He's with Toma.

FKOD: And where's Toma?

Airon: In the basement on the computer, I think.

FKOD: Oh well, he can read the log if he wants to know. Man, logging is nice. Anyways, the enneagram! It's a personality typing system based on motivations.

Ramada: I never really cared for personality tests.

FKOD: Okay. I know it's not everyone's cup of tea. But I'm obsessed with it, because I'm a five and we obsess!

Demetria: Is that something to be proud of?

FKOD: Idunno. Anyways, let's start with the basics. There are nine types! There are three triads that the types go in: the gut triad, the heart triad, and the head triad. There are more triads, but I'm not going to go in-depth with that. Anyways, the ennegram is depicted as a circle with the nine types on the outside, and there's lines connecting them. The lines show what other types one type goes to in certain circumstances.

Airon: So what do you mean when you call me a one?

FKOD: Ones are in the gut triad with eights and nines. Ones are motivated by the need to be right, and they are terrified of being evil, corrupt, and wrong. Does that sound like you, Airon?

Airon: Yes.

FKOD: Awesomesauce. So, ones are often called the reformers or the perfectionists. Ones have this critical voice in their head that's always telling them how things can be better. Ones are always struggling to live up to their own high standards, and to improve everything around them. The problem is, when other people aren't living up to a less healthy one's standards, the one will try to impose their will on others! Sounds like someone we know, right Airon?

Airon: Uh...

FKOD: "Toma, you're singing off-key." "Ryyx, don't be so loud." "Gaia don't be so rude."

Airon: ....

FKOD: Continuing on, ones are connected to fours and sevens. When ones are stressed, they become moody like average or unhealthy fours. And when they're healthier, they become less strict like healthy sevens. Also, I should note that all types are affected by the types on either side of them. Those are called wings. Usually, one wing with affect your personality more than the other. With a nine wing, ones are detached and less emotional. A two wing makes a one less detached and a little more focused on how people feel.

Airon: I'm not that critical, am I?

FKOD: Ones tend to be critical. Each type has flaws as well as advantages. As a five, I overthink things and tend not to act very quickly.

Vivo: Just like you overthink doing homework!

Mort: Or making a post on a forum.

Demetria: Or doing the fun fact!

FKOD: Oh. Right. Hm... Did you know: Einstein was married to his cousin.

Vivo: Whoa, really?

FKOD: Yeah. It was his second marriage, and he didn't have any kids with her.

Dr. Blobagus: You don't think Sarah could be my cousin, right?

Demetria: Sarah is a nesting doll. She isn't related to anyone.

Dr. Blobagus: Ah. Of course. In that case, I think I'm inviting her to prom.

FKOD: Prom? Blobagus, you don't go to school.

Ramada: Wait, is he talking about the party that the twins are throwing?

FKOD: What twins?

Airon: Oh yeah, Javel and Minen are throwing a party on Friday.

Ramada: You should come, it'll be fun!

FKOD: Hm... maybe. I'll have to think on it. Like a five.

Ramada: You really do obsess over everything, don't you?

FKOD: Yup.

Dr. Blobagus: Ramada, will you help me pick out a prom dress?

Ramada: Dr. Blobagus, you can't wear dresses.

Dr. Blobagus: Are you insulting my body weight? I think you're fat too.

Airon: What? Ramada is very thin.

Ramada: Airon, Airon, Airon. He's just saying that because he's insecure about his weight.

Dr. Blobagus: Insecure? Airon is the insecure one. He is always locking doors, all the time.

Airon: No I don't.

 
V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Vivo

Gender: M

Character type: Uramametchi

Age: 7 years

Gen: 51

Job: Balloon Catcher

Status: Just a little glitchy

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Mort

Gender: M

Character type: Samuratchi

Age: 7 years

Gen: 9

Job: Banker

Status: Welcome to Glitchville

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Demetria

Gender: F

Character type: Marotchi

Age: 2

Gen: 22

Friendship: 4/6

Status:

Mort: Guys guys guys guys guys!

Vivo: What?

Mort: Last night my fisticuffs stat shot up to 999! My weight went up to 98! Isn't that weird?

Demetria: Uh oh. That sounds like a glitch.

Mort: An awesome glitch. I just need to work off the weight and I'm golden.

Vivo: Well, you're not the only glitchy one. The matchmaker brought me a mametchi.

Demetria: Wait, you have a child though. Shouldn't that be kind of impossible?

Vivo: Impossible is just an excuse for not trying!

Mort: Well, the matchmaker brought me a mess of pixels the first time. She wasn't really my type, so I said no. Then the second time I got a shitekitchi.

Demetria: Hm. That doesn't really sound good you guys. If both of you have glitches, couldn't both of you end up... non-functional?

Vivo: Well, mine is pretty minor. Plus, Gaia mentioned that mine has happened before with other tamagotchis in the past.

Mort: Yeah, I guess mine is more worrisome... but didn't Asula end up getting an old lady through the matchmaker at one point?

FKOD: Yeah. But hey, look at the user name on your thingy, Mort. The 'a' is all messed up.

Mort: Hm. Well, that's nothing too major.

Dr. Blobagus: I could fix you Mort.

Mort: I... I'm good. I'll be fine. Don't mind me.

Dr. Blobagus: Did you not here the little samurai say that you could become non-functional?

Mort: I am the little samurai.

Dr. Blobagus: No, you're the the little geisha.

Mort: No, I'm the samurai, and Demetria is the geisha.

Dr. Blobagus: Oh really?

Mort: Yes, really!

Dr. Blobagus: Well, if that's the case, then I'll have to fix Ryyx instead.

Vivo: But there isn't anything wrong with Ryyx.

FKOD: Yes there is!

Vivo: I meant his physical health.

FKOD: Oh.

Dr. Blobagus: No, no, he needs surgery for his issues with his husband.

Vivo: He's not married yet.

Dr. Blobagus: Right. Well. He needs surgery to make his hair beautiful then.

FKOD: Airon already thinks his hair is fabulous, though.

Dr. Blobagus: Right. Well. He needs surgery for to make him into a deity.

FKOD: NO!

Dr. Blobaugs: Right. Well. He needs surgery so that the matchmaker won't bring him a shitekitchi.

FKOD: Blobagus, just calm down and get back into your box.

Dr. Blobagus: Oh! You know, Gaia, I think you need surgery!

FKOD: You need surgery! You look flat and deflated! *grabs a pair of scissors*

Dr. Blobagus: Oh. I see. Well, do your worst.

INTERMISSION TIME, brought to you by Mort who is horrified to see what Dr. Blobagus's innards really look like.

Now for yet another episode of Pokemon Drama, a gripping story about Pokemon who are experiencing drama.

Terry: Haze, you have to stop spending so much time in the casino!

Haze: I'm sorry! I think I'm... addicted.

Terry: You need help!

Haze: You're right, but we can't afford counseling! We have to take care of the little one!

Terry: Wait, doesn't gambling take money?

Haze: Dude, it's that Voltorb flip game. It doesn't cost anything to play.

Terry: Oh.

INTERMISSION END.

FKOD: Guys, stop looking away. All that was inside of him was empty space and this techy doodad.

Vivo: Really?

FKOD: Yeah. Dr. Blobagus, how do you work?

Dr. Blobagus: I am powered by two Duracell AA batteries.

FKOD: Uh huh. There aren't any batteries in this thing though. Well, actually, I see some tiny ones. But I have it here and you're still working.

Dr. Blobagus: That's just my spleen.

FKOD: 'Kay.

Mort: Well... Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Demetria: Some people don't even celebrate Thanksgiving.

Mort: Well.... shush.

 
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V4.5 Status (Green with black swirls)

Name: Tea

Gender: F

Character type: Hitodetchi

Age: 0 years

Gen: 52

Job: Preschooler

Status: What a bunch of crazies

V4.5 Status (Autumn leaves):

Name: Cake

Gender: F

Character type: Kuribotchi

Age: 0 years

Gen: 10

Job: Preschooler

Status: She knows what she is saying

Tama-Go Status (White)

Name: Demetria

Gender: F

Character type: Marotchi

Age: 3

Gen: 22

Friendship: 6/6

Status: Just trying to help

Ramada: Aw, you're not going to the party?

FKOD: I have to update the blog.

Ramada: Pfft, you have no problem putting off your homework, so why is your blog so important all of a sudden?

FKOD: Because my brother really wants me to do it.

Ryyx: Don't your teachers really want you to do your homework?

FKOD: Shut up Ryyx.

Epere: Just accept it Gaia, you're a hypocrite.

FKOD: I know that! You don't have to tell me.

Ryyx: He can if he wants to.

FKOD: Okay, seriously, when did you and Epere become bestest buddies, anyways?

Ramada: Ever since they made out.

Epere: Shut up, Ramada. We were sharing body heat, and nothing like that ever happened.

Ryyx: All we did was talk.

Ramada: Uh huh. A likely story.

Tea: Ramada, it would be physically impossible for Ryyx to kiss Epere.

Ramada: What?

Cake: Yeah, our teacher told us today that you can't kiss anyone who isn't your spoose.

Demetria: Spouse.

Cake: Uh, yeah, that.

FKOD: No, it's not impossible, it's just considered cheating.

Tea: You mean like cheating to win?

Cake: Silly Tea, you can't win at love! It's not a game.

FKOD: No, I meant cheating as in being untrue to your lover.

Tea: Oh, it's one of those words that means more than one thing.

Cake: The one you need contest clues for.

Demetria: Context clues.

Cake: Demetria, I know what I'm trying to say, okay?

Ryyx: Anyways, the point is, Epere and I are just friends. We just respect each other more now, that's all.

Ramada: People in love respect each other!

Ryyx: Ramada, stop being so rude! You know I would never cheat on Airon!

Ramada: Unless you were mad at him.

Ryyx: What? I wasn't mad at him before that happened! Maybe afterwards when I found out how hard he was on Toma, but we worked that out.

FKOD: Guys, it's fun listening to you argue and then typing it down and posting it on the interwebs, but isn't your party starting soon?

Epere: Yeah, let's take this outside. Maybe we can settle this elsewhere. *glares at Ramada*

*they leave*

Tea: Gaia, your friends are weird.

FKOD: You know what else is weird? Today's fun fact! Did you know: hippo milk is pink.

Dr. Blobagus: Just like Epere and Ryyx's blossoming love.

Tea: If they heard you say that, they would probably be really mad.

Demetria: Everything that Blobagus says makes people either mad or confused.

FKOD: Or both! Anyways, toodles!

Cake: Wait, don't leaf me!

FKOD: I'm not going to cover you in leaves.

Demetria: She meant leave.

FKOD: Oh. I was directing that 'toodles' to the readers.

Cake: Oh okay.

 
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