Dear dad: I request an allowance raise because of the bullspit I have been put through today (copy of our conversation below).
Me said:
Dad: **rage clicking the mouse way too dang hard**
Me (quoting him, about three weeks ago when I was doing rage clicks): "Doing that won't make the computer go any faster."
You then proceeded to rant at me never to say anything like that to you ever again. You implied that if I did, I would be physically harmed. This is called child abuse, and I assure you 100%, that if it EVER happens, I will call CPS and take you to court. And believe me, I could get you on a lot more grounds than just child abuse.
The next time I make tater tots for dinner, you better watch out. I may just get back at you by putting dog spit/crap in them.
Another issue I will address is the bedtime one. I only stay up late at night because I need light in my room. If I don't, I sit there in terror, scared I'm going to be kidnapped for no reason. Even though it's a stupid fear, it's a real one that I'd never tell you (it's one of my biggest secrets). So, until you push me over the edge, I will not care to tell you why I literally CANNOT stand to go to bed until I fall straight asleep.
Also, here.
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Since I'm such a little girl to you.
Dear ----: Please continue not to talk to me or to fight with me. Believe me. It's one of the nicest things that has happened to me in a LONG time.