OK I finally know the name of my weird sexuality ^_^ it is...MY WEIRD SEXUALITY there is absolutely NO definition for being physically attracted to girls the same age as you but romantically attracted to boys at least 4 years older than you. That definition of my sexuality actually 100% makes sense and explains all the crushes I've ever had. It means I can never have a proper relationship though because I cannot be physically and romantically attracted to one person xoxoxoxoxoxo