Please tell me if this is OK

[LilDewd]

GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The next Dustin Part in IN THE PM Inbox!

 

[Wine_Deer]

WOOT WOOT I WON THE ESSAY CONTEST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[LilDewd]

DUH! We ALL knew you would!

 

[Crowfrost]

*Nod nod*

OMG! HI LILDEWD! *Glomp*

 

[LilDewd]

HEZZO! Wine_ Deer! Check ur mail!

 

[barky]

Chapter OneOlive slipped in mysteriously, as if nothing had happened, though a lot had happened. She coolly sat down at her desk, which was far from the others. Her mom had sent her to this academy of the gifted, thinking she would feel closer to her surroundings, including the people. But really, she couldn't feel any farther away. It had all started last week when she was at the beach. It was a hot day and Olive was having a blast swimming in the water. It was pretty steady, but she wanted some waves to swim against. She only thought about it for about 2 seconds when a giant wave came on. Though Olive convinced herself it was only a coincidence she was still suspicious. When she saw somebody surfing, she grasped her chance. She concentrated on a huge wave for the surfer, just big enough that he could surf it. For some odd reason, she could just tell what kind of waves he could surf. That's when it happened. The wave Olive had been thinking about had come right when he got to the location it would form. It looked exactly like the one she had imagined. Scared, Olive swam to shore and demanded her mother tell her what happened.

Her father, Odus, had been gifted by a fairie of the water. She, Olive Oceana Otelia, had the gift of controlling the ocean. Knowing this day would come, her mother, Obioma Ofra Otelia, had her sent to St. Bonteys, a school for the gifted. Unhappily, Olive obeyed her mom's orders and went. It was now her first day, and she knew nobody. She missed her old friends, family, and most of all, the ocean next to her house. She always went there and that was her place that she could go and all her stress would disappear as she would breathe in that salty smelling ocean air. Covering her face, she allowed a tear to dribble down her face and splash onto the desk, and for a moment, Olive could see a wave of the ocean in her head. She begged for it to stay, but it was just a small bit of her happy memories at that beach. Drifting away in her memories, she barely heard the bell ring, as class had just begun. A man with a face that had tentacles walked in.

“My name is Davy Jones. Call me Mr. Jones.” He said in his hoarse voice. “Normally, I would send you to a certain room, based on your… gift. Today, however, I want you to stand up when I call your name and share what you can do. Tonya Brookfield.” A brown haired girl with freckles stood up.

“I can jump to unusual heights.” Then she sat down. Olive bit her lip, closed her eyes tightly, and hoped with all her might that the main office had made a mistake and didn’t put her name on the list.

She listened to everybody, but what really made her eyes open was when she heard somebody stand up and say “I can fly.”

Olive had always wanted to know what it felt like to fly. It was a red-haired girl, who was beginning to rise in the air. She was obviously unaware of it until Mr. Jones said

“Thank you, Skye.” That was when Skye realized that and came back to the ground. “Maybe, like mom said, I will make a friend here…” Olive thought. For the next bunch of kids she heard some strange powers. The boy next to her, apparently named Rock, had told the class that he can talk to hummingbirds.

“Olive Otelia.” She heard a familiar hoarse voice say. Nervous, Olive stood up and said quickly,

“I can control water.” As soon as she said that, a ripple of whispers crossed the room. Olive couldn’t hear what they were saying, so she didn’t know what to make of it. If it was good, bad, creepy or common. She sat down, and listened to the other students. When the bell rang, everybody rushed to the doors, except for Olive and Skye. Olive was planning on approaching Skye, but instead, it was vice-versa. Skye smiled nervously and said

“I think your gift is cool. I never even knew anybody could have that gift.”

“Thanks,” replied Olive “Your gift is cool too. Flying is great, at least, so I think.”

“It’s OK, but once you get used to it, it’s just like riding a new bike. It’s fun for a while, but then you only use it when you need it. I found out I could fly about 2 months ago. When did you find out? You know, about your gift.”

Olive looked her in the eye and said, “1 week ago. How old are you?”

“Ouch. Shocker finding out that you’re gifted huh? I’m 12. You?”

“I’m 12 too.” Olive ignored the first statement. “Erm, what do we do now?” Olive and Skye had begun walking together.

“Follow me.” Skye said, taking her hand and pulling her through the crowded corridor.

“Here we are!” Skye said with sarcastic glee, opening the door to a plain bedroom with 6 beds. “We get to pick the bedroom we stay in. Don’t worry boys have the right corridor and we have the left.” She reassured Olive, seeing her worried face. “You can sleep next to me if you like. Girls are about to come running in here wanting one of the beds here. So we gotta pick first.” Skye informed her, putting her bag on a bed.

“Why is this bedroom so popular?” Olive asked her, putting her bag on a bed by the window, next to Skye’s.

“Look outside.” Both girls looked outside and saw an amazing, beautiful view of the mountains, pond, trees, and hiking routes outside.

“That is so ama-” Olive didn’t get time to finish. About 12 girls came stampeding in, claiming beds. It lasted about 3 minutes before disappointed looking girls, yet still pretty cheerful, filed out. For a moment, there was a peaceful silence, and then the clamor spread through the room. Olive, staying silent, unpacked her clothes from her bag into the dresser next to her bed.

When she was done, she rummaged through the rest of her stuff, which was toiletries, books, pencils and a notebook, her diary, and a picture of Olive with her mom in front of the ocean on the beach. Only Olive knew that hidden in that frame was a picture of a boy she liked before she moved near the ocean. His name was Dustin Tines, with light brown hair and green eyes. She knew he liked her, but they didn’t want to admit it. She put the photo on the dresser and lay on her bed, resting from the journey from her house, to here. Closing her eyes, she thought about how she would spend much time here. It seemed like one minute to her but when she heard the dinner bell, she knew it had been 1 hour. Skye walked over and shook Olive’s shoulder

“Wake up! It’s time for dinner.”

“I wasn’t sleeping.” Olive said “I was just resting.” She got off the bed and followed Skye to the dining hall.

When the two girls walked in the dining hall, they saw 3 long tables lined up in the dining hall. Olive walked in awkwardly, though Skye walked in comfortably as though she had done this all her life. They sat at two empty seats at the end of the table. Sitting across them, was Rock from Olive’s class. He was silent, as if almost shy, but he didn’t seem like the shy kind of guy to Olive.

“Hey.” Rock murmured, who was suddenly very interested in his mashed potatoes. Seeing that Olive was just staring at the food lied out in front of them, Skye said,

“Help yourself. You are allowed to eat it you know.” Olive gave an embarrassed smile and filled her plate with steak, mashed potatoes, salad, and a piece of a loaf of bread. She also filled her glass with water. Olive began to dig in her mashed potatoes when she noticed Skye staring at her water.

“Ok, unless that water is poisoned or dangerous in anyway, I don’t wanna know why you are staring at my glass.” Olive grinned.

“I…wanna see you use your gift…” Skye gave a nervous smile.

“Erm… I guess I could try.” Olive stared at the water in her glass and concentrated on a ripple going through it out of nowhere. Nothing happened.

“I can’t.” she sighed and went back to cutting through her steak. A disappointed looking Skye played around with her rice and finally said, “I’m not that hungry. I’ll see you in the bedroom.” And she walked out of the kitchen, up the stairs and to the bedroom. Olive shrugged and finished off her steak.

Skye, on her bed, was wondering why Olive couldn’t use her gift. “Maybe she is a faker! And she wanted to come here because she thought it would be exciting to see all these people using their gifts! It’s official. I am going to question her. Tonight.”

[SIZE=14pt]That is the end of chapter one. I don't have a title for it so if you have any ideas that would be great. What do you think?[/SIZE]

Wine_Deer it's great!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

When you said you were writing a book, I had never imagined how wonderful and descriptive you are!!!!

Write more! More! More!

Best Wishes,

barky

 

[Wine_Deer]

Wine_Deer it's great!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!When you said you were writing a book, I had never imagined how wonderful and descriptive you are!!!!

Write more! More! More!

Best Wishes,

barky

Wow...thankies. XD I am writing more!

 

[LilDewd]

It IS awesome! KEEP WRITING! YAY!

 

[barky]

Hehe, I thought you'd only done one chapter! I've just read all of them, 1-4, and was thinking that if you ever got this book published, and someone asked me what my favourite book was, guess who it would be???

[SIZE=13pt]YOU!!![/SIZE]

Tehe, I forgot to mention this in my first reply, I like the idea of the Pirates of the Carribean Davy Jones. Love it!

Please write more! I love it!!!! It's one of the best things I've read so far in my entire life!!!! Really, I'm not taking the mickey or anything!!! LOVE IT!!!

Best Wishes,

barky

 

[Skippy~Tama]

Wow. You really should keep writing. I liked it. ^^

We'll settle on, 'If you post more, I'll be sure to read it.' ;]

 

[Wine_Deer]

ATTENTION EVERYBODY WHO LIKES THIS STORY:

I've some bad news. I appreciate and feel warm and fuzzy inside when I read these comments. It makes me feel so good and thank you all so much. But...I'm thinking ONLY THINKING about discontinuing this story. It's too much like playjerizing (dont care how it's spelled). The Charlie Bone Series, an already published series, is about a boy named Charlie with a gift, who goes to a school with gifted and Non gifted kids. They get into trouble blah blah blah, the Cook is an important role and it's a school where you only go home for weekends and holidays.

BUT THERE'S GOOD NEWS ALONG WITH IT!!!

I started a new story! It's my own idea, so I won't discontinue it, unless it's bad. I might start a pole with the first chapter of each of them and have you Tamatalkers vote. WHICH SHOULD GO ON? Look out for it. It'll probably be titled "Survival of The Stories" and the description will be "Which story will turn out?" In fact, I'll make it right now.

 

[LilDewd]

That is STUPID! You know what? I'll e-mail the author personally! To ask if it would be ok to use her concept of a school of kids with magic powers, and a Cook-like person named Chef X. I am SERIOUS.

 

[Wine_Deer]

*cowers* uh...u know what? I'll think about it. I just was a lil worried.......*scared*

 

[LilDewd]

Lol, don't worry, I didn't find her.... but still, I dont think she'll sue you or anything for writing a book about a school full of kids with powers and with a "Chef x"

 

[Wine_Deer]

ok i'll keep on writing!

 

[LilDewd]

[SIZE=25pt]YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!![/SIZE]

 

[Crowfrost]

Lol, don't worry, I didn't find her.... but still, I dont think she'll sue you or anything for writing a book about a school full of kids with powers and with a "Chef x"

^^

 

[daydreamer]

lololololololololololololololololololololololololololololol i am working on it. but i haven't had much inspiration lately (usually comes to me at school). I might keep writing slowly ZOMG!!!!!! AM I ON DAYDREAMER???? ZOMG SORRY THIS IS WINE_DEER I JUST MADE A NEW ACCOUNT XD! lol i am working on it though. i used all my creation in another story i am writing so i need to lay off writing for a while so that the creation, ideas and inspiration come flowing. but i will keep writing every now and then and when i get inspiration and idea then i will finish up chapter 5.

 

[Wine_Deer]

sorry about that....

here are my accounts just so you can tell:

Wine_Deer

daydreamer

Redwall_rockz

Blackdevil

 

[kaffeeklatschgirl3]

Hey, how about for a title you could have "The gift of waves"? You could also make a trilogy or series or whatever. Also you should put in your book at some point what Olive looks like.