This is funny...

[Crystalized]

I copied this from an e-mail I got from I friend:

~Here it is~

Hope you enjoy these:

Only in America .......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in America .......do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

Only in America .......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

Only in America ! ......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

Only in America .......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

Only in America .......do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.

Only in America .......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

EVER WONDER ....

Why the sun lightens our hair,

but darkens our skin ?

Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?!

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle)...in other words, send it to everyone. We all need to smile every once in a while !!!!!

 

[xplosionoftamas]

I copied this from an e-mail I got from I friend:
~Here it is~

Hope you enjoy these:

Only in America .......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in America .......do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

Only in America .......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

Only in America ! ......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

Only in America .......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

Only in America .......do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.

Only in America .......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

EVER WONDER ....

Why the sun lightens our hair,

but darkens our skin ?

Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?!

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle)...in other words, send it to everyone. We all need to smile every once in a while !!!!!

I think you are mixed up with something else. Actually, I'm not really sure =/

 

[Caterpie]

Its kinda funny. I got something called girls, and what boys ecpect from them.. it was weird...

 

[*LoVeLy.SwAn.23*]

Lol, so many of these jokes passing around, you'd wonder where these people get it from

 

Please stop with the quoting of long posts. It takes up too much bandwith <_<

 

[babygotchi]

Lol.

I've seen that before on (Non)-TT.

Can I send it to my friends?

 

[Sweet Kandi]

I can put on mascara with my mouth closed XD Took practice, but I can do it!

I hate chain letters, but this one always amuses me.

 

[tamatalker101]

Very funny indeed.

I think in AMerica we do such things becuase everyone is foucoused on the future not correcting what we have, Ya get it?

 

[baybee-x]

I like it , I've seen the last bits before but not the 'Only In America'.

I got send this one from a friend which I quite liked;

THE SILENT TREATMENT

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment.

Suddenly the man realized that the next day he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.

Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,"Please wake me at 5:00 AM." He left it where he knew she would find it.

The next morning the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight.

Furious, he was about to go to see why his wife hadn't wakened him.

When he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up."

Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.

 

[~TearsxarexlikexStorms~]

I like it , I've seen the last bits before but not the 'Only In America'.
I got send this one from a friend which I quite liked;

THE SILENT TREATMENT

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment.

Suddenly the man realized that the next day he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.

Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,"Please wake me at 5:00 AM." He left it where he knew she would find it.

The next morning the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight.

Furious, he was about to go to see why his wife hadn't wakened him.

When he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up."

Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.

LOL, that is so funny!

 

[MsKtty89]

If we were ever to invent time travel, wouldn't we now be seeing people from the future?

I've read many sites with that sort of thing on it. Some of it's funny, some is just like... Eh.

I don't read chain letters or letters from people I don't know. They're either marked as spam or deleted.

 

[Crystalized]

Lol.I've seen that before on (Non)-TT.

Can I send it to my friends?

Yeah, whatever...(Of course)

Well, I thought it was some-what worth posting.

 

[Missbehave]

lol funny! (And the woman mascara thing, it's because on tv you when women are putting mascara on they always have their mouths open)

 

[Crystalized]

Really? I didnt know that...

 

[Broken~Wings]

I can put mascara on weith my mouth closed, but my concealer, oh, thats a toughy....

LOL, I love that chain letter!

 

[meowbark]

I can put on mascara with my mouth closed XD Took practice, but I can do it!
I hate chain letters, but this one always amuses me.

I can do it easy?