Hey, New song again

[~Red~Rose~]

I've sent two songs before,and the comments were good, so this is a new one I wrote yesterday.

You Gotta Dance

Verse 1

Turn up the music

Turn off the lights

Spread out on the dance floor

It's the night of all nights

Everyone find a partner

Put the disco ball on

It's not a competition

Dancings about having fun

Chorus

You gotta dance

Until you can't feel the ground

You gotta dance

Until the misic is the only sound

You gotta dance

Like it's the only thing you have

You gotta dance

Verse 2

No time to be lazy

Time to dance the night away

You could lose track of time

It could be the next day

The day is for working

The night is not

The night is for parties

Music, dancing, the lot

Chorus

Bridge

The night is just right

The music's just fine

Lets go out and have

A Real-----Good------Time------

Chorus x2

End

Oohhh- You gotta dance

Oohhh- You gotta dance

Whoa Whoa Whoa- You gotta Dance

I really dont care if I get bad comments. It will help me improve. It would also help if you give me a mark.

 

[Neon Tiger.]

It's...

notgoodatall.. ._.

 

[TamaMum]

It's...
notgoodatall.. ._.

Bad comments will only help a member improve it they are actually constructive criticism.

You have posted some good song lyrics on this forum in the past, so it would be helpful to explain more clearly what it is about this song that makes you judge it "not good at all" - otherwise it would appear that your reply is just spiteful badmouthing

As for me. The song appears to be fairly typical "pop" style lyrics. This is not a style of music I like much at all.

However, for "pop" lyrics you seem to have captured the short, sappy style that is popular with a lot of people. By my own judgement, your lyrics are not bad and comparable with many of those I hear in the pop charts these days :furawatchi:

 

[Neon Tiger.]

^ What I mean, they just seem a bit meaningless.

Not really flowing, no sortof, feeling.

 

[Cinderpelt]

As for me. The song appears to be fairly typical "pop" style lyrics. This is not a style of music I like much at all. However, for "pop" lyrics you seem to have captured the short, sappy style that is popular with a lot of people. By my own judgement, your lyrics are not bad and comparable with many of those I hear in the pop charts these days

I agree.

What I think is your lyrics aren't really that original. I was reading them and was thinking, "Man, I think I've read this before!"

I mean, it's a good start. If you continue writing lyrics, they should get better over time.

 

[Neon Tiger.]

It's not bad,

But I think you should write them with a concept in mind.

Tell more of a story,

Then .. who knows?

 

[~Red~Rose~]

I agree.
What I think is your lyrics aren't really that original. I was reading them and was thinking, "Man, I think I've read this before!"

I mean, it's a good start. If you continue writing lyrics, they should get better over time.

Well, I used a bit of different songs like 'Until you cant feel the ground' is partly from 'Play my music'.

How does it not flow, and why is it pointless, Neon Tiger?

 

[illiey12]

I quite like them, but as some other people said, try making it into a story. Its a good start though, nd with some practise, you may turn out to be a pretty good song writer

Good Luck!

 

[Neon Tiger.]

It IS pointless.

I know good lyrics when I see them :/

This is not good lyrics.

 

[_Flame_]

^I think a lot of songs have pointless lyrics and can still be enjoyed.

But that's just me.

 

[x.addicted.x]

^ What I mean, they just seem a bit meaningless.Not really flowing, no sortof, feeling.

I agree. Like, I hear what you're saying, but, they just.... don't sound like you mean them. They don't have emotion or meaning to me. You need to work a story into it, along with the other lyrics. It sounds like it could be Disney.

Love-

Phobo-x.addicted.x-x.N e o n

 

[.:Charm:.]

It's too...uh...Miley Cyrus-ish. Also try not to repeat some words too often!

 

[bratztroxg]

It seems a little repetitive. Like, the one message is "Dance", which we've all heard a million times before in a million different pop songs.

But in all honesty, it's really not that bad! Add a catchy beat and I'm sure it would actually be a great fun dancing song. Just not that meaningful.. It's fun, though! =3

P.S. Neon Tiger, you are being a little mean. And I know you're going to quote this and say that you have a right to say you don't think it's good but I actually believe that yours was on this same level so please be more polite. =)

 

[Neon Tiger.]

It seems a little repetitive. Like, the one message is "Dance", which we've all heard a million times before in a million different pop songs.
But in all honesty, it's really not that bad! Add a catchy beat and I'm sure it would actually be a great fun dancing song. Just not that meaningful.. It's fun, though! =3

P.S. Neon Tiger, you are being a little mean. And I know you're going to quote this and say that you have a right to say you don't think it's good but I actually believe that yours was on this same level so please be more polite. =)

Actually, I'm not as predictable as I seem. =/

I'm gonna quote this, and say;

I don't know if I have the right to say what I'm saying, but you post online, you better be prepared for bad comment. :/

I don't care what people say about my stuff

Often it's helpful and I actually take it on board, and sometimes I just realize the idea was total rubbish.

 

[Cullen]

Actually, I'm not as predictable as I seem. =/
I'm gonna quote this, and say;

I don't know if I have the right to say what I'm saying, but you post online, you better be prepared for bad comment. :/

I don't care what people say about my stuff

Often it's helpful and I actually take it on board, and sometimes I just realize the idea was total rubbish.

And stealing.

Also, taking parts from other songs, No.

Its nice, meaningless, dance music. Like most of the music out there today.

You could get somewhere.

 

[Neon Tiger.]

It's not bad,

But it's not good.

I mean, you might get somewhere.

In Disney.

x__x;

 

[Trainwreck]

That sounds just like Miley Cyrus' "Let's Dance." So, it's really not that good and a copy.

 

[.tee.hee...x]

Okay, I have a new song.

Dreams

Verse 1

Close your eyes

Everythings gonna be alright

Next to you I'm here

You can let your

Imagination soar

Chorus

I'll take your hand

Into mine

Follow me to

A better place so far away

All you need is

Creation, imagination

You can let your dreams soar

Verse 2

Forget your pain

Forget the world around you

Not even the sky's the limit

You gotta let you

Creation come to life

Chorus

Bridge

You don't need wings

The story's in your hands

Think of the story

And I'll do the rest

Chorus x2

End

You can let your dreams become real

Imagination

Creation

You can let your dreams soar......

I know it repeats, but it has to. What do you think

(PS: I'll be posting quite a lot of songs because me and my friends have made a band now. So some of them will have music)

 

[Ruby_Red_Robin]

I like it.

 

[.:FeeBumbleBee:.]

That was sooo Disney, it's not even funny. Actually, it is a little funny.

You should work for them when you're older. Because Disney is really rich and successful. XD